Grad School is Rad School-Update 2 (Time is Just a Concept)

Is it just me, or is time like...not even a thing anymore? I swear it was October like, yesterday.

I can't believe that it's already 2017! I finished/survived my first semester of grad school, two rotations, and managing to be 20 years old all at the same time. I have learned soo much and can't wait to see where the rest of this semester takes me!

Classes

My classes last semester were tough to say the least. Neuroanatomy was great, but I just barely passed Cellular and Molecular Neuroscience (considering I failed the second test, I'm pretty ecstatic I don't have to retake the class). I definitely learned a lot about when to study, and how to learn new things I'm not familiar with. I also learned that laughing at yourself is the best medicine when you're totally lost in class-if I had a dollar for every time I confidently blurted out a 100% wrong answer I'd be able to buy a second car! But often times the wrong answer makes the right one even more memorable.

Rotations

Rotations have been SO FUN. I completed my second rotation with a project focusing on how rats walk when they have Parkinson's. It was really cool to get experience working and training the rats, and learning more about how to self-direct a project in a lab. Rats are definitely waaaayyy nicer than mice!

One of the tasks I had to train the rats on was walking through paint. Turns out rats are NOT AFRAID TO JUMP ON YOU WITH PAINT ALL OVER THEIR FEET!

Now I'm on my third rotation, and am working on a project where we analyze the early immune response to MS in mice. There are definitely some familiar techniques from my undergrad, but I'm learning a lot and really like the focus on both neuroscience and immunology.

Life in General

Since I last updated in September, I have had soooo many fun experiences!! Seriously, life is so good! So for lack of a wordy explanation, I thought I'd include some picture highlights :)

DISNEY WORLD!

HARRY POTTER WORLD!

SPACE WORLD! (Kennedy Space Center)

Dyed my hair pink-literally the best hair color ever. Not sure if I'll ever go back.

The LDS Institute held a world-record breaking speed dating activity!

ESPN's College Game Day came to the U! Another Neuro student and I left a conference at 3am to drive down and see it. We were soooo tired but it was sooo worth it!

Took a solo road trip down to St. George and got to see my cousin's play!

Black Friday with Kadie-so tired but we hauled!

My house for the Festival of Trees in December!

Christmas Christmas Christmas

Insatiable reunited for a few shows and we got to see one-so fun to see "Rockstar Dad" again!

I was invited to speak on college at my old middle school! Such a cool experience (and also completely terrifying).

Health

Halfway through fall semester my health really started to go downhill-I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep, it was miserable! I started missing class pretty consistently and losing lab time. Finally I went to a doctor to figure out what was going on and IT WAS STRESS. Seriously. So we adjusted my diet and understanding of how my body reacts to it, and life is sooo much better. I've also upped my workouts which has helped tremendously. A big lesson these past few months has definitely been that keeping your body healthy is more important than extra study time or no sleep.

Dating

Alright I promise not to get too mushy but Bryce and I have been dating for almost two months and HOLY MOLY he has changed my life. His patience, sensitivity, humor, and kindness are just a few of the qualities I have come to love about him. We have had a number of crazy adventures (getting stuck up a canyon, going to a ska music show, and building a campfire in 10 degree temps to name a few) and here's to many more!!

At Dad's show!

All in all, it has been an incredible few months. Time seems like it keeps speeding up but hopefully it is always toward bigger and better things!

Grad School is Rad School: Update 1

Hey guys!

I am quickly coming up on finishing my first 2 months of my Ph.D. program here at the U. I am exhausted, stressed, but oh so happy! This is literally a dream come true and (so far) the program has lived up to everything I thought it would be.

The program started with a 2 week laboratory "bootcamp", where me and my class were trained on basic lab techniques in Electrophysiology and Molecular Biology. It was unbelievably exhausting, starting with Molecular Biology. As a Psych major, my experience with the subject matter pretty much extended to my high school AP biology class, which I hadn't thought about since, well, 2013. 8-10 hours in lab for 5 days straight can really take it out of you, but we all made it through with only minimal emotional scars. Electrophysiology was much more fun (for me)-we took electrical recording from nerves and brain slices, and learned a lot about basic electrical signals. The hours were shorter and it actually motivated me to arrange for an electrophysiology rotation later in the fall!

After bootcamp "official" school started with classes and my first lab rotation (I will do a total of 4). Classes are fun-I have to take Cellular and Molecular Neuroscience and Neuroanatomy. I love anatomy but cell and molec is a trial (to say the least). But I'm learning a lot and often have moments where I am totally giddy that I am living my dream. Studying is hard but it gets better!

Studying at McDonald's-Actually not as bad as it sounds.

Neuroanatomy Lab-Sooo fun! My favorite part of class.

Right now I'm finishing up my rotation in a molecular biology lab working on Ataxia disorders (a relative of ALS and Parkinson's), and trying to put together a poster presentation for a symposium next month. I have an exam next week (that still haven't studied for-undergrad habits die hard), and am looking forward to fall break and the start of a new rotation!

Mumford and Sons Concert-SO AMAZING

Of course with all of the class work and lab time I have made some time to have some fun! The Neuroscience program had a student retreat where all of the 1st years got to know the other students, there have been dinners and symposiums and plans for many more in the future. I've started running again and working with a personal trainer at the gym-the stress relief is SO WORTH IT!! I went to my first concert and totally fell in love, have dated and shopped and enjoyed this time in my life more than I ever thought I would. Can't wait to see what these next few months will bring!

Skinny Shaming.

I never thought I would have to write an opinion on something like this.

In fact, I HATE that I have to write something about this, but I think it needs to be said.

A trend in pop culture has recently been exacerbated by Meghan Trainor's hit "All About that Bass."

Skinny Shaming.

While earlier it has seemed to hang on the periphery of thought, Skinny Shaming is now becoming more commonplace online and in pop culture. Skinny Shaming is the act of bullying someone because they are skinny. This can range from accusations of eating disorders, to name calling, to underestimating low self esteem because somebody is already thin and should just be happy with it. And it is often not recognized as bullying because the victim is not overweight.

One of the most commonplace forms of skinny shaming occurs when stores post photos of thin models for their clothing lines. The comments on these photos often include accusations of anorexia, that the company is not representing "real customers", and many other hurtful statements. The outcry from these photos usually results in them being taken down and replaced with models that are more "realistic". (and I do realize that many of these photos are altered, but there are people who are naturally that thin.)

Can we just look at this for a second? Here people are accusing someone of having a serious illness. They are accusing someone of not being a real person, solely based on their body type! And this happens all the time, outside of large company postings. I have seen similar comments on the Instagram profiles of regular people.

With the popularity of "All About that Bass" and other similar songs, Skinny Shaming has now entered the spotlight as a way of "empowering" overweight people to be more confident. Here is a line from "All About that Bass" that highlights this problem:

"Boys like a little more booty to hold tonight."You know I won't be no stick figure silicone Barbie doll"

This horrifies me. Because I'm thin boys won't like me? Because I'm thin I'm a "Barbie Doll"? How is putting other peoples' body types down ok, let along empowering?
Let's try something to illustrate my point-Here is a reversal of this line to reflect the mindset of "Fat Shaming" (a perspective I DO NOT support, this is just to show the impact).

"Boys want a little less booty to hold,
You know I won't be no roll-figured cow"

If a song were to come out with lyrics similar to this, there would be a worldwide outcry. But songs that share the same perspective, just directed toward a different group of people, are topping the charts. These songs have the same impact on thin people as the altered line would have on people who are overweight.

I have had personal experiences with Skinny Shaming, going back as far as I can remember. I've been told to "shut up" when talking about my body, because I'm already thin. I've had friends make fun of me for wearing smaller sizes than them. Virtually every part of my body has been laughed at because I am smaller than average. It's hard to have high self-esteem when you are being bullied, and no one recognizes it as bullying because of your body type.

So what can we do?

1. Stop listening to "All About that Bass" and other Skinny Shaming songs. These songs are not empowering, they target a specific group of people and tear them down based on physical characteristics. Not ok.

2. Don't joke about body types. Skinny Shaming jokes are just as harmful as Fat Shaming jokes, and you never know how sensitive someone is about their size. One strong joke can hurt even the most self confident person.

3. Stop looking at body types at all. Compliment on the flattering fit of a dress, not how small she looks in it. There are a million things to compliment someone on other than their size (and almost all of them are more meaningful). Don't refer to yourself as "fat" or "anorexic", and don't let anyone else refer to you by those terms.

Everyone is individual, their eyes are individual, their personalities are individual, their fingernails are individual, and their body types are individual. You wouldn't mock someone because they had a different eye color. Don't mock someone because they are a different size.

You are not defined by your body type, don't degrade and define others by theirs.

Blogging

I really want to be a better blogger! AH.

New Years and Motivation.

New Years is always interesting for me.

I set great goals for myself, like eating healthier and exercising more, but those goals NEVER last past January. It's really my issues with motivation.

You see, I have a lot of bad habits.

Staying up late.

Procrastinating.

Bad Eating Habits.

Spending Too Much Time Online.

Not Exercising (Outside of Dance).

And I honestly want to stop them. I would love to have a regular sleep schedule, eat healthy, and have my schoolwork done before I have to rush it. But there's this issue with motivation.

I've kept these bad habits for so long because I don't have the consequences from them.

Staying up late: Yeah I may not get enough sleep, but it doesn't REALLY affect my life that much.

Procrastinating: I still get A's, so why does the timing matter?

Bad Eating Habits: I don't feel sick from eating and I'm not putting on any weight, so why eat healthy?

Too Much Time Online: I still have time for everything else, so I don't need to shorten the time.

Not Exercising: I still dance twice a week, so that's enough right?

But in reality, I do have the consequences.

If I stay up late, I often sleep through class, which adds unnecessary stress to my life.

By procrastinating my schoolwork, I'm not doing the best work I can do, I'm simply doing enough to get by. I'm losing opportunities to push myself and receive advice from professors that spend their lives studying this subject.

Even though I don't feel unhealthy, I would feel much better if I ate better.

If I took a half hour of my internet time and switched it to writing time, I would have an additional 3.5 hours to write every week.

And even though Dance is good exercise, I would be healthier by adding in more variety, like Yoga or Swimming.

So this year I want to really commit.

Not just to my resolutions and goals, but to a shift in my thinking. 

My bad habits are no longer ok simply because they do not have apparent consequences.

I'm in a good place right now, but I want to make these good habits to become BETTER.

I want to have a better sleep schedule so I can feel more alert, not just awake.

I want to plan my schoolwork so I can do my best, not just get the grade.

I want to eat better so I can feel better, not just feel full.

I want to spend less time online so I can improve, not just explore.

I want to exercise more so I can be fit, not just thin.

And there are so many more goals I want to make and achieve.

So my new years resolution this year, among many others, is to become BETTER, not just good.

10 Things that made Me Smile Today

1. Outgoing people on TRAX.
There are always two or three people on TRAX who smile and make conversations with stranger.It brightens up what would normally be a really dull ride in the mornings.

2. Talking with the cute guy in my Writing class.
Subnote, we were also put in the same group.

3. Eating not one, but TWO Rice Krispy treats today.
Does this even need an explanation?

4. The wildflowers next to the Murray North stop on TRAX.
These flowers are super pretty-they're orange and pink and blue and purple. I will be seriously depressed when the snow covers them up in a few weeks.

5. The cushy seats in the Behavioral Science Auditorium.
These seats are ridiculously comfortable.

6. Talking about China's air quality in Government.
In a weird way, I almost miss breathing in dirt 24/7.

7. Talking with one of my friends from Herriman.
I miss them all so much, it's nice when I get a chance to chat via text.

8. That I actually have a semi-solid story idea.
I love that feeling when I have a story to write, and it feels like I have to get it down all at once or I'll lose it. It's exhilarating.

9. That I got ready and was out the door in 6 minutes FLAT.
Seriously, this is an impressive feat.

10. Working on my design idea.
Super relaxing and fun. I love designing.

Long Distance Mustang

Today was my last day of high school.

I walked out of those doors knowing what I was about to lose.
I am losing the opportunity to see my friends everyday. Those amazing friends that I have had and have made this year. I'll miss them with all my heart and you bet that I'll be harassing them all summer to hang out. I am losing the interaction with the amazing teachers at Herriman. The teachers that pushed me to the top of my ability (cough MRS. HILL cough), who showed me that yes, I COULD do math, who showed me that my writing didn't sound like some teenage drama. I am losing the chance to go to school with my sister. The next time we will could possibly go to school together will be in 5 years.
But I also knew what I was about to gain.
An experience that will change my life, that already has changed my life. The chance to push myself into areas of learning that I have been craving since middle school. A CHALLENGE for the first time in my educational history. I will be with people who want to learn, who crave learning the way I do. Plus I'll be going to the college that I have been dreaming of since elementary school.
So walking out of Herriman came with a mixture of bittersweet feelings.
But you bet that I'm still a Mustang.
I'll be at every football game, every basketball game, every school dance (someone better ask me to prom.) All I'll be talking about at college is how great high school was. I may never walk the halls of Herriman as a student again, but I will still be a Mustang. Just farther away. So farewell Herriman, you've taught me much, and gave me even more.